The Big Ask, The Big Give: Aaron's Request

Dear Family and Friends,

Writing this letter is one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. It weighs heavily on my heart to open up and share such a personal plea, yet I feel there is no other choice. Since July 2023, I have been battling End-Stage Renal Disease (ESRD), a relentless, life-altering terminal illness commonly called final or stage five kidney failure. This diagnosis has turned my life upside down. Every day, I’m connected to a dialysis machine for 12 -13 hours, to keep me alive and my body functioning while I wait for a kidney transplant. It’s exhausting, both physically and emotionally. There are days when I feel completely isolated, alone and profoundly worn down. Everything I once enjoyed—time with family, moments with friends, even the simplest pleasures in life—now seems to slip further from my reach. I feel the ache of what I’ve lost—the chance to share meaningful moments with my loved ones and my three dogs, who have been my loyal companions through it all. 

Before my diagnosis, my life was full of purpose and joy. I dedicated myself wholeheartedly as a public school teacher for over a decade and eventually began working in higher education for the last four years. Teaching and supporting students from kindergarten through college filled my heart and defined who I am. Today, I face the reality of having to step away from that calling, missing the vibrant connections and opportunities to inspire young minds and live my purpose. Thinking I may never be able to return to the work, students and colleagues I love or fully embrace life as I once did leaves an emptiness in my heart.

Alas, there is hope! I’ve been placed on the national transplant list and am working with the UVA Health Transplant Center, but the wait for a kidney from a deceased donor can stretch beyond five years or more. While I wait, my health is slipping away a little each day. My two brothers, who mean the world to me and have been faithful tent poles through this ordeal, have graciously offered to donate a kidney, but circumstances currently make them ineligible to donate.  

This brings me to the most vulnerable part of this letter: I need to ask for your help. I am searching for a living kidney donor, someone who could offer the gift of life. A living donor reduces my wait time and provides better short and long-term survival rates. Even more, a living donor gives me the chance to return to the life I’ve worked so hard to build. Those who know me understand how private I usually am so asking this of anyone is incredibly difficult for me, especially as someone who has always preferred to be the one helping others. But now, I’m placing my hope in the kindness of family, friends, and even compassionate strangers who might consider being tested to see if they’re a match.

If you or someone you know might consider this profound act of generosity, it could be the gift that saves my life. I understand the gravity of this decision, and there is support to help answer any questions and walk with you through every step. You can learn more about living kidney donation through the  National Kidney Foundation’s website or by contacting their helpline at 855.NKF.CARES (855.653.2273). If you are ready to be considered for a living kidney donation, please visit the UVA Health Transplant Center  and indicate my name, “Aaron F,” as the "Intended Recipient" on the intake form.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for taking the time to read my story and consider my BIG ASK. Whether through living donation or by helping me spread the word, your support gives me hope for a brighter, healthier future--life. Often I am asked if I need anything. My answer has always been simple: continue to pray for me and send me your thoughts. I know God has a plan for me. I now add that you help in spreading the need of my request.  

With all my love, gratitude and faith,

Aaron